Humble’s House of Slime

Humble Howard has released a book called The Slime That Men Do. It’s a very fun read for a really good cause.

The stories are all apparently true and collecting them began with a radio bit. With a few exceptions from men tattling on bad women, the stories come from women, about the truly awful, thoughtless and sometimes even malicious things their dates/fiancés/partners/husbands/boyfriends have done to them. Some of the transgressions have been forgiven, some are unforgivable, like the woman whose fiancé left her just before their rather elaborate wedding because he was already married. Yikes!

The incidents bring back memories of the sometimes horrifying ordeal that the dating scene can be. I could relate to some of them (cheap guys, poorly dressed guys, mannerless guys) and others are truly outrageous.

A chapter on first dates is delightfully cringe-worthy. One seemingly normal man suddenly stands up in a crowded movie theatre and begins yelling at the characters on the screen while his date tries to sink into her seat. Another man is so creepy and sickeningly complimentary that the bartender and wait staff offer to cover the bill if the woman wants to run out while the guy’s in the washroom. Most of the tales do not end with “happily ever after” but they are downright funny in a thank-God-that-wasn’t-me way or as the Germans call it, schedenfraude.

Part of the proceeds from the book go to the Breast Cancer Foundation. Give Howard tons of credit for finding a rare niche for what will likely become a series with an endless amount of material. As long as men and women continue to date, he will never run out of stories.

I worked with Howard at MIX 99.9 during his first stint there, many years ago. He has a big heart and I hope the book is a huge success. I found The Slime That Men Do in the Self-Help section at Chapters, but it reads more like Comedy to me.