Celebrity Rant Classics
On the best of Stern this morning, they replayed a bit involving some ravings and rantings by Judy Garland, ostensibly as the faded star was telling her life story to a transcriber or ghost writer. It was hilariously sad, as the bitter actress and singer waxed on (and on) about all of those she felt had done her wrong. And it brought to mind some other legendary rants I’ve heard. You can find some of these at Celebrityrants.com for free. Casey Kasem and the infamous “dead dog” American Top 40 diatribe. “I want a goddamn concerted effort to come out of a record that isn’t an uptempo record everytime I do a f***ing death dedication!”
Orson Welles, before he walks out on a commercial voice-over gig. “Show me how you can say “In July” and I’ll go down on you!”
Efrank.ca had a new one that’s destined to be a classic. It’s Paul Anka, on his latest concert tour, bawling out his band. Just when you think he’s out of steam, he goes madly off in a new egomaniacal direction. “I’m the important one on that stage!” “Don’t make a maniac out of me!” It’s very “Sopranos”.
But one I wish I could find, that I also heard on Stern, is legendary NBC anchor Jessica Savitch, throwing a tantrum because a floor director wasn’t available for one of her classic Nightly News teasers. I was a huge fan of Jessica’s. She was a tremendous influence on my decision to get into broadcasting and once I got older and learned more about the mess her life was, she intrigued me even more. I remember following the production progression of the movie “Up Close And Personal” which was supposed to be based on Jessica’s life, but which ended up like so much movie pablum, in a sucky love story. I was very disappointed.
Jessica died in a horrible car accident in 1983 in what must be history’s worst ever first date. If she could have kicked drugs and a penchant for lousy men who beat her up and treated her like crap, she might have become what Barbara Walters is now, only with perfect diction and better hair.
